escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
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