Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Randomize
