Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
