So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
