That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize