and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
