oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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