Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
