I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
