apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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