he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
There r osticjed everywhere
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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