There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
