I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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