She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
