I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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