THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
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