Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
