Your tits are I can't wait for
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Randomize
