The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize