This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
