Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
