If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
