I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
