while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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