we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Randomize