They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
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