if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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