It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
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