so that wasnt chicken after all
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
