Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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