Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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