We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
