I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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