Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
