yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize