Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
