I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Randomize
