Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
i drank out of a bidet.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Randomize
