If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
