her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
