dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize
