Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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