sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
