i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
