it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
