That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
