You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize
