just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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