East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
