I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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